Archive for the ‘83 precinct’ Tag

Mickey and the mickey   Leave a comment

 April is said to be the cruelest month. The poor bastard in this story would probably agree with that. This happened on April first, April Fools day which was quite appropriate.The cops involved were Mickey (The Rhinestone Polock) Kowolski and Billy (Disco Billy) Zemeckis. Billy got the name because he thought that he looked and danced like John Travolta, the young Travolta of course not the old fat one. Now Mickey got his name because he was always dressed to the nines and also dancing. He was very happy with that nickname since his old one before it was changed was “Young Frankenstein” that was because he looked like he had been bobbing for French fries instead of apples. He must have had a major acne problem as a teenager.

They were just driving along with their disco blasting from the radio when central called.

“Eight-Three Charlie-David 10-54 1250 Hart Street third floor accidental stabbing. K”

“Charlie-David enroute, Central has an ambulance been dispatched? K”

“ETA thirty five minutes advise of situation when on the scene. K”

“10-4 Central Charlie-David enroute.”

Upon arriving at the scene they were met by a young woman. She waved them down screaming, “Hurry up. He’s upstairs and bleeding bad.”

As they were making their way up the stairs Billy asked, “What happened? Did somebody stab him?”

She answered, “No, he just bought a big Bowie knife and was showing off doing tricks with it. He twirled it around and stuck it in his pants and when he did he cut his penis off. There is a lot of blood.”

Billy stopped and looked at her for a second, “Did he just cut it or is it completely off?”

“It was on the floor when I ran down to get you.”

“Is there anyone up there with him?”

“A couple of friends of ours are with him. They are trying to stop the blood with a towel.”

As the cops came through the kitchen door they could see him lying on the floor. His friend a man had a bloody towel pressed between the injured man’s legs. The floor was covered with blood. The injured man slowly tilted his head to look up at them and said hello. His face was waxy white and he didn’t seem to feel any pain or to even know what was happening.

Mickey went out into the hall and radioed Central, “Eight-Three Charlie-David to Central K.”

“Charlie David”

“Central put a rush on that bus for Hart Street. We have serious bleeding here.”

“Standby Charlie.”

A minute later Central was back on the air, “Charlie EMS advises they are busy and it will be at least twenty minutes.”

“Central, advise EMS that if it is going to be twenty minutes they could cancel the bus and just send the morgue wagon. This man will be dead in ten minutes.”

“Standby.”

“Eight-Three Charlie EMS advises they have a bus around the corner they can redirect to you they should be there in a minute or two.”

“Thank you Central. I will have someone downstairs to direct them.”

Mickey went back into the apartment and asked the woman who had directed them to the scene to run down stairs and show the ambulance crew the way up.

As she was leaving the apartment the other woman on the scene came up to Mickey and said, “Here you better take this with you.”

Mickey put his hand out expecting the knife. Instead she dropped the man’s penis into it. Mickey jerked away his hand away and the penis flew across the room sliding to a stop by the stove. ”

“Lady, can you put that thing in a plastic bag with some ice. It needs to be kept cold if they hope to sew it back on.”

She was back in seconds with the penis in the bag with a dozen ice cubes. Mickey gingerly held the bag by the top with two fingers until the ambulance crew’s arrival.

When they arrived Mickey handed the driver the bag while the EMT worked on the injured man. The two cops carried the man down the stairs to the bus. They had all the information they needed but still followed the bus to Knickerbocker Hospital. They wanted to see how the poor son of a bitch made out and they wanted to say hello to a few of the nurses.

At the hospital Billy was telling a couple of the nurses the whole story.

He told them, “Here we were I was getting the injured man’s information for the report. His friend was applying direct pressure to the wound. Mickey over there was just standing watching us with the guy’s dick in his hand. So we are working and Mickey is just holding holding the man’s Mickey.”

Mickey started waving his hands, “No, no that’s not how it was. It wasn’t like that. I told them to put the dick in a bag with ice. At no time did I ever touch that man’s dick. Billy, don’t you go spreading rumors about me holding some guys dick. I never did that, I don’t hold anybodies dick.”

Billy and the nurses burst out laughing at the red faced Mickey. He didn’t speak to Billy for the rest of the day.

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Posted November 17, 2017 by kevingcox in Random Thoughts

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Missed it by that much   Leave a comment

Here is one of the stories in my new book. It is almost done now. I am halfway through December. The year will be over soon. I am still trying to think of a good Christmas story so if anyone had one they would like to share I am listening. The names I use are not the real names. That is of course if the stories are true which I will never say. The nicknames I use are just because I like the names. They don’t mean that they are in anyway related to what the story is about,

 

This story involves Ron Byrd and Denny Fry. That would be KooKoo and the Bubbler to those who read my first book. A couple of days after the incident at The Big G KooKoo and The Bubbler responded to a 10-10 Recorded Alarm down on Varet Street on a four to twelve tour.

Arriving on the scene Denny started checking doors and windows on the first floor looking for an open door or glass break.

KooKoo used the flood light in the car to scan the upper floors for broken windows. As his light swept by the windows all was secure. Then he thought he saw movement and raised the beam to the roof. He looked up and saw a man standing at the edge of the roof looking down at him.

KooKoo jumped out of the car and yelled, “Denny he is on the roof. We got him.”

Denny ran to an alley between the five story building the burglar was on and the building next to it. He hoped to find the open door there away from the street lights.

KooKoo yelled over, “We are going to find this asshole. He won’t get away today. I saw him first, he’s mine.”

As Denny started down the alley he noticed movement above him. He looked up and saw the burglar jumping from the roof to the building next door. Denny heard a scream as the felon failed to clear the alley. He watched the man all the way down. The burglar landed about five feet in front of Denny. Apparently seeing the two cops and knowing there was only one way in or out of the building he knew he had to do something or he was going to jail. So he tried to jump the alley.

KooKoo yelled over, “Was that him? Can you see him?”

Denny Answered, “I see him. He’s here Ray.”

“Did you catch him? Is he running? Remember he is mine.”

Denny yelled back, “I didn’t catch him. But he ain’t running. He is all yours Ray.”

KooKoo came running around the building and saw his Burglary collar in a bloody heap, “What the hell happened?”

Denny said, “He tried to jump from building to building.” He held his thumb and forefinger about an inch apart and in his best Maxwell Smart voice said, “He missed it by that much.”

“Did you check? Is he dead?”

Denny said, “I didn’t have to check. He landed head first sounded like someone dropped a watermelon off the roof. That splot by the dumpster is half his brain. We better get another car to search the building.”

KooKoo said, “Yeah and I’ll call for the Sergeant, the squad, and a bus. Do you want to go to the morgue tomorrow?”

“Sure why not. I haven’t been there in a month. Tomorrow is our last one I could use the longer swing.”

KooKoo went back to the car and advised Central what was needed.

Five minutes later Sergeant Capp arrived on the scene. KooKoo was waiting on the street while Denny stayed with the body. They didn’t expect any people but they really didn’t want to explain how they failed to notice the rats were eating the perp so Denny was the rat chaser.

KooKoo explained to Sergeant Capp what happened.

Capp said, “Are you sure he is dead?”

“Yeah, Sarge he is dead.”

“Okay where is he?

“Over here in the alley.”

Sgt. Capp walked into the alley took one look at what a few minutes before had been a Burglary collar and whistled, “Well, you were right, that son of a bitch ain’t never getting any deader than he is right now. When the Squad and the ME get here don’t forget to show them where the rest of his brain is. Who is going to ID?”

Denny said, “I am Sarge.”

“Did you see him come down?”

“Yeah, Sarge.”

“What happened?”

“Sarge, it is about fifteen feet from roof to roof. I guess he judged the distance and figured he could make fifteen feet easy. As it turned out fourteen was easy, fifteen not so much. He landed about five feet in front of me.”

“How are you feeling with it?”

“Well Sarge, I gave him a nine point five. I would have gone higher but he really failed to stick the landing.”

“Okay, you sick bastard. I’ll move you to tomorrow’s eight to four. You remember how to get to the morgue?”

“Yeah I can find it.”

“Did you find the break?”

Denny said, “Yeah it’s this door but we haven’t been able to go in to search. He hit right as I was going for the door. I called for backup Sector Eddie is coming to search the building.”

“Good, after you see the ME stop at the house.”

“Okay Sarge.”

Sector Eddie searched there was no one else in the building. The owner was called to secure his business. The squad and the ME both said apparently accidental and the morgue wagon took the not quite athletic enough burglar away.

As Hank and I entered the Station House the next day we ran into Denny on his way out.

 “Hey Denny, How did the morgue go?”

Denny answered, “Those assholes are sick. I go in there to ID the burglar and they have him completely split open. One of the aides or whatever the hell they are is eating with one hand as he works on the body. Stuff is dripping down his glove and falling into the chest cavity. I tell him watch it, it’s dripping in the body. He says that’s okay that he is going to close him up now anyway. He says it’s sort of the D.O.A.’s last meal and starts giggling like an idiot. And they call me a sick bastard. I don’t think I’ll ever eat another Sloppy Joe.”

 

Posted July 31, 2017 by kevingcox in Random Thoughts

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Down by Newtown Creek   Leave a comment

I am back with a little story, nothing heavy today. But before I get into the story I would like to say my wife Nancy is healing pretty well from her new hip. I told not to say I never get her anything new anymore. She should graduate from walker to cane in a few days which isn’t too bad since she had the operation less than a week ago.

Anyway back to the story. Back in the 70’s the 83 ran north of Flushing Avenue all the way to Maspeth Avenue. This little story may or may not have occurred in that area.  It is a very abridged version of a story in the sequel to “A Year in Bushwick”. I call this version Down by Newtown Creek.

Down by Newtown Creek

Gerry and Bob were working a twelve to eight tour. It was a quiet midnight tour. Sunday going into Monday was often quiet down in Sector George, the factory and warehouse area at the north of the precinct.

Just after 0100 Central called with a recorded burglar alarm down by Newtown Creek. The partners responded there all the time, almost always a false alarm. The building took up a whole block and was over a hundred years old. Five or six times a month when the wind blew the windows would shake setting off the alarm. If there was an actual break it was always through the roof. So as soon as they arrived on the scene it was straight to the roof. They walked the whole roof there were no breaks. When the partners finished checking the roof they were on the opposite corner of the building from their car.

Gerry said, “This is all bullshit. Now we have to walk around this whole damn place checking for breaks.”

Bob shook his head, “Screw that, look we both know it’s a shit call. The wind is shaking the damn windows again. I’ll find a place to climb down on this street. You go to the corner and find a place on that street. I’ll go left you go right and we meet at the car. If we find a break we can give a yell over the radio. If not we can get the hell out of here.”

“Sounds good to me, meet you at the car.”

Gerry climbed down to the street and started walking checking each door and window as he went by. He had gone about forty feet when he heard a high pitched bloodcurdling scream from Bob around the corner followed by several shots. Drawing his gun Gerry ran for his partner.

As Gerry turned the corner he saw why Bob screamed. The street was covered with rats. Not just rats but tens of thousands of rats. It looked like a dirty gray brown carpet and to Gerry it felt like the skittering, squeaking, squealing, slithering swarm was coming right at him. Bob ran by him screaming then it was Gerry’s turn to scream like a twelve year old girl. Gerry turned and ran screaming behind Bob.

See, Bob had climbed down with his back to the street and dropped the last six feet. When he hit the ground something moved under his feet and he fell backwards. He landed flat on his back but not on the street. He landed on rats. He had rats under him, rats on top of him, rats all around him. That is when he screamed and shot a few. His sudden appearance yelling and shooting panicked the rats and they ran in all directions. Bob managed to get to his feet and run that is when he flew past Gerry who was also screaming at the time.

Once back in the car the two cops agreed to never tell anyone how they were chased screaming to their car by rats. They also agreed that they would get revenge.

They stopped back at the precinct to get what they needed from their lockers. They bided their time until things quieted down. At three thirty they decided the time had come. The partners quietly made their way to the spot they had chosen. It had pallets stacked on the side of a building on the rat infested street. Gerry opened his case and laid his equipment out on a pallet.

Gerry put down a .25 Berretta and a Walther PPK a .380, smiling at Bob he said, “These should do the job.”

Bob just shook his head and said, “These will do the job.” He opened his case and pulled out a Ruger Super Black Hawk .44 Magnum and a .45-70 revolver.

Gerry said, “Bob are you insane. We’re going for rats. Those things are for grizzlies.”

Bob smiled, “I don’t want to wound any.”

It was now time for Operation Ratfuck to begin. Gerry opened up on the rats. He started with his .25. It had a short barrel but accuracy wasn’t really necessary. There were so many rats in front of them it would be impossible to miss hitting one if you fired in the general direction. Each shot he fired dropped a couple of rats.

Gerry said to Bob, “See the twenty five is all you need.” just as Bob fired the 45-70. Rats flew in all directions several of them torn in half.

The two opened up when the rats started moving. As each emptied a gun they would just drop it and start shooting with the next. In less than ten seconds all guns were empty. The street was now clear of living rats. In the area Gerry was firing there were over two dozen dead rats. Where Bob fired there were only pieces. Lots and lots of pieces.

Within minutes the first calls came from Central of shots fired at their location. Gerry answered the call, “83 George enroute.”

The two cops threw the guns into their gym bags and tossed the bags into the trunk of the car. They could hear sector cars closing in on them as they gave the disposition back.

“83 George to Central, Have the responding units slow down. It looks like the shooters are gone on arrival. They were apparently shooting rats. There are dead rats all over the street.”

Sgt. Capp arrived on the scene, “Did you two see anything?”

“No, Sarge.”

“I guess you didn’t hear anything either?”

“Not a thing Sarge.”

“Okay, leave the rats for sanitation to take care of. You two go wash the gun powder off your hands.

“Yes, sir will do.”

So ended the great rat safari.  Bob and Gerry got their revenge and felt a bit less embarrassed about screaming like little girls earlier.

The next night at the change of tours Wild Eyes Willie from the four by twelve stopped Gerry, “Hey Gerry, The Buzzard and I went to where you had the rat shooters last night. To see if we could find anything.”

Gerry said, “Did you?”

“Yeah, we were just getting ready to leave when I spotted something in the water. We found a floater. He was shot in the head.”

Gerry just looked at him for a second and felt a little dizzy. Thinking a stray shot had hit someone. The area should have been deserted at that time. After a few seconds he managed to say, “Do they think he was killed last night?”  As visions of prison danced in his head.

“No, the ME said he had been in the creek for four or five days. It looks like a mob hit and dump.”

Gerry said, “I better go get changed before I’m late for roll call.”

Gerry ran up to the third floor stopping at the men’s room to throw up before going to his locker. Bob was changing in the locker next to him.

When he saw Gerry he said, “Damn, are you sick? You look like shit.”

Gerry answered, “I’ll explain in the car.”

Posted May 29, 2017 by kevingcox in Random Thoughts

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The Garbage Man   2 comments

Patrol I bet you thought I forgot to get this weeks blog in. No I didn’t. I have just been pretty busy this week. I have been writing a lot hopefully most of it will make it into my new book. The is of course completely fictional. Don’t ever let anyone tell you different.  So I have a little story I am going to share this week it’s called “The Garbage Man.” Like I said it is a total fiction and anyone who says it is not is a liar.

THE GARBAGE MAN

 Sean was working with Bob this four by twelve. Bob and Sean had been partners for years but when Sean was transferred to the Arson Task force the partnership ended. Bob had since partnered with John and Sean with Hank but it was good when they occasionally got thrown together. They knew each other so well that they didn’t have to discuss how they would handle it when sent on a dangerous job. Each knew the others every move.

They had a nine o’clock meal. This was spent in the luxurious precinct lounge. The lounge was equipped with twenty year old third hand couches and a TV that the cops had chipped in for.

After meal the two returned to patrol for the last two hours of the tour. Tour is NYPD for shift. It was eleven when they got a call for a ten-fifty two family dispute on Putnam Ave. the second floor left apartment. It was an apartment they each had been to several times before.

They arrived and knocked on the apartment door, “Police open up.”

A young girl’s voice answered from inside, “Who is it?”

Sean replied, “It is the PO – lice now open the door.”

The door was opened by the girl. She was about nineteen she had been beaten. Her face was swollen and black and blue. The cops asked who hit her and if she wanted to go to the hospital.  She claimed that her live in boyfriend didn’t hit her that she had been hurt when she fell outside. Sean and Bob tried to get her to admit the truth of what happened and press charges but she refused. She did not want anything done, just wanted him out of the house. They told him since he was not on the lease he would have to leave.

It was frustrating for them but it that time if she would not press charges there was nothing that could legally be done despite obvious signs of injury. Mister asshole also knew this and was showing his ass the whole time we were there. He was wise mouthing and making threats. He was being the big bad man in front of the girl trying to make her even more afraid of him.

He turned to her, “Next time you call the cops on me I will kick their asses and then your ass for calling them. That’s if they even have the balls to show up once they know it is me.”

Bob told him, “Look, stop with the mouth just throw some clothes on and take a walk.”

He kept it up while he was getting his stuff together to go. He kept muttering about the bitch and cops and what he would like to do to the piece of shit cops next time. The two cops walked out the front of the building with the skell after listening to him rant for about fifteen minutes while getting dressed. On the sidewalk he turned to Bob.

“Next time you show up when I’m teaching that bitch a lesson you will learn what happens when you mess with a real man.”

Bob answered, “A man doesn’t beat up women. A man shows respect.”

He answered, “That’s not a man that is a little pussy like you.”

Bob asked Sean, ” Sean, Is this a man?”

Sean shook his head, “No Bob, this is not a man”.

“Then what is it Sean?”

“Garbage.”

“Are you calling me garbage mother fucker?”

“Yep and we wouldn’t want to litter would we Bob?”

“No we wouldn’t Sean. Where does garbage belong?”

“In the garbage can.”

The two cops jammed him into a garbage can in front of the building with his knees folded up to his head. Then they put the lid on and left. The shift ended and they went home at midnight.

The next day as they were getting ready to head home Davey White the Sergeant’s driver from the midnight tour came over and asked, “What happened last night?”

“Nothing much, Why?”

“About two o’clock I was driving the Sergeant down Putnam Avenue and we heard someone calling for help. We searched for who was calling and as I went past one building I heard it come from a garbage can. I took the lid off and there was a guy ass up in the can. I didn’t expect that. All I could see was his ass and one foot.”

He said, “Help me out of here.”

I asked him, “How the hell did you get in there.”

He said, “Some asshole cops stuck me in here, I can’t get out.”

“I knew it had to be you two.”

Bob and Sean started laughing and told Davey the whole story of the dispute.

“What did you do with that skell, Davey?”

“I put the lid back on the can, told the Sergeant that it was just kids goofing around and drove away. I made sure not to go back to Putnam for the rest of the night. I don’t know if he is still there.”

“Don’t worry about it. Bob and I checked. He isn’t there anymore. Either he got out or the garbage men took him to the dump.”

He laughed, “Good, because I was going to stay off Putnam if you hadn’t told me that. Do you have any others stuffed around or any dead bodies I should avoid?”

“Not tonight but check back tomorrow. You never know.”

That’s my blog for this week. See you next week.

 

 

Posted January 28, 2017 by kevingcox in Random Thoughts

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One for the Road   1 comment

coffinI am sure many of you who were cops have been asked how you handled the things you saw. I have been asked that many times. My short answer is humor. The more skin crawling the incident the darker the humor would be. It was not always ha-ha funny, often the reaction would be the groan of a bad pun. “That’s disgusting” was often heard from non-cops. As for cops the usual reaction to a real good/bad incident joke would be a laugh and “You are one sick bastard.” The secret was to never ever take it to heart. Here is a quick story to illustrate what I mean. How many of you who worked in the 83 remember this incident?

It was on a midnight when the call came in 10-10 Recorded Alarm. It was at a funeral home, which one I won’t mention. The assigned car was checking the perimeter when the owner arrived and opened the door for them. They went inside to check and all seemed secure. There are few places as eerie as a funeral home at two AM so they were moving pretty fast to get out of there. All the doors were unlocked except one.

One of the cops asked the owner, “What’s in this room?”

He replied, “Nothing it’s just a viewing room. Go on in.”

The cops answered, “The doors locked.”

The owner said, “It shouldn’t be. Hold on I’ve got the key.”

When he unlocked the door the cops told him, “Wait up, let us go in first to check it out.”

They entered cautiously sweeping the room with their flashlights. One of the beams of light illuminated a coffin on the far end of the room.

The cop holding that light exclaimed, “Holy shit.”

They approached the coffin as the funeral director entered the room. Inside the coffin was the body of a woman. She had been turned to face down in the satin lined box. She had been bent at the waist and up on her knees. Her dress pulled up over her back exposing her ass. A pair of pants was on the floor at the foot of the coffin. They found the perp hiding behind the drapes that served as a backdrop.

They pulled him from the concealing drapes at gunpoint. He started crying, “Don’t shoot me. I didn’t do anything wrong. She’s my girlfriend.”

After questioning the male told his side of the story, “We’ve been having an affair for ten years. Her husband is my friend and I am married. I really loved her but she wouldn’t leave her husband. When she died I knew I couldn’t let her go without saying goodbye. I hid in the bathroom when they closed. I wanted to make love to her for the last time. So it’s okay I can leave now that we have had our last goodbye.”

Turning to the funeral director he said, “ Do you want me to fix her clothes or do you want to do it?” To the cops he said, “Don’t tell my wife or her husband okay?”

The cop said, “Put on your pants. You’re under arrest.”

“No you can’t arrest me I just told you its okay. We are in love.”

The cop said, “Unless she gets up and tells me that you are under arrest.”

Unlike Lazarus she didn’t awaken. He was taken away to central booking and from there to court. It made for an interesting Arraignment the next day.

So that is an incident that would give many people nightmares. For the cops in the precinct the reaction was a bit different, for next month every time a cop drove past that funeral parlor he would ask his partner if he wanted to stop in for a cold one. That is one that usually gets the “That’s disgusting” from non-cops and a laugh followed by “You are one sick bastard” from cops.

What I have been doing   1 comment

Brooklyn Bridge 1Just thought I would write a few words to say what I have been up to. First I had a minor cancer problem but that has been corrected. It was pretty stupid. I has a squamous cell cancer on my foot. I called it my Wide World of Sports Cancer. You remember the agony of de-feet.

I am trying something completely different now with my writing. I am writing two books at the same time. I never know which one I will be writing until I sit down at the computer each day. These books will be different from the first. They will follow a more normal beginning-middle-end route. I will also proof read these and have them edited to remove errors rather than to add some. Here is a little peek into each book.

The first one is a story of two guys born the same day in the same hospital in 1950. One is from Red Hook his father is a machinist. The other from Cobble Hill and his father is a loan shark with The Family. As they grow up their paths keep crossing and their lives become entwined. As the dock work comes to an end in the Hook one becomes a cop the other follows in his fathers footsteps.

The second is totally different. This one keeps changing. I wanted to see if I could write a zombie story. It started out as a quick short story. I thought it would be about fifty pages and a straight normal zombie story but it didn’t want to go that way. It has morphed into a story of people coping with life in that world. It has changed into something that has never been done before. It is set in New York and also has a sort of Mad Max feel to it. It sounds like there is no way those two genres can mix especially in the city but I have figured a way it works. When I see it in my mind it is spectacular of course when I put it on paper it may suck. Luckily I really don’t care. I may never publish either one but it is fun writing them. Anyway they at least keep me busy.

Posted February 11, 2015 by kevingcox in Uncategorized

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Reunion war stories   Leave a comment

83 pctHarry and Sean signed into the annual Eight-Three reunion and were greeted by Frankie the Face. Frankie always ran a good affair. The partners grabbed a couple of beers and headed into the hall to mingle with old friends.

They were called to a table by Wild-Eyes. Willy was sitting with Sugar Bear and the Vulture.

As Sean and Harry sat down they caught the end of Willy’s celebrity story.

“So we’re driving by and I see some skell sleeping under the El on Myrtle and Broadway. I go over and wake the fool up. It turns out he was a player for the Islanders. They had just won the Stanley Cup and he was out partying all night. He had no idea how he ended up under the El in Bushwick. So we run this Canadian asshole into the house so he can call for someone to pick his drunk ass up. Twenty minutes later a limo shows up and takes him away. Why can’t I get service like that?”

Harry said, “I know what you mean. If you’re rich and famous you live by different rules. I used to work personal security guarding celebrities for that place on Morgan Ave. Most were okay but one famous comedian was the cheapest son of a bitch I ever dealt with. This bastard would wear his underwear once then have them burnt. He had no problem buying new tighty whities and undershirts every day but treated us like garbage. When most of the clients would go out to eat you would sit at the table next to them and they would spring for at least a cup of coffee or something. But this cheap bastard would go into a restaurant order a meal that cost three or four hundred and not drop a dime for us. Then he would complain to us that we should order something so we aren’t so conspicuous, like we could afford to pay twenty dollars for a cup of coffee. A cup of coffee cost about thirty cents in the seventies. When payday came we didn’t see a dime. I had to go up to the boss of the security firm and ask what the problem was. He said that this multi-millionaire claimed to be broke. He played a tape he had of a phone call with this son-of- a bitch crying that he was cash poor. He made more in a week than we made in a year and he expected us to carry his tab. I told the boss I didn’t work for him I worked for you. You pay me, I really don’t care if he ever pays you. Just don’t call me next time he needs security. I deal with enough assholes on my regular job. I got my money and next time he was in town they called and I told them to go to hell.”

Sean gave his favorite celebrity story next, “I was working a barrier detail putting up no parking signs and blocking streets off with barriers for a parade one day. Me and Herb were just getting done with one corner when a car goes two wheels up on the sidewalk to get around us and the barrier. He drives halfway down the block and parks under a sign. It turns out he is a famous actor, a real man of the people type married to a singer even more famous than him. Anyway as he’s getting out of his car I yell to him to move the car that he can’t park there. He just looks at me and goes right on walking towards an office building.

Now I am getting a little pissed off and I tell him, ”Hey, move your fuckin car now.

He turns and says, “Don’t you know who I am?” and keeps walking.

I told him, “I know who you are and what you are. You’re an asshole and if you take one step into that building you will be an asshole without a car because I’ll have it towed.

He got all pissy and stomped back to his car. As he opened the door he yells out “I’ll have your job for this.”

I smiled and said “Then can I have yours it pays better.”

That really pissed him off. He got in his car and drove away cursing out the window. I don’t know if they let the stars get away with that shit in L.A. but it don’t fly in N.Y.C.”

Posted October 9, 2014 by kevingcox in Random Thoughts

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Marion Harmon, A Writer in Vegas.

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Michael Ray King

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My Elicits, an Inception... Learning to Live in Perfection

The Jenny Mac Book Blog

Jenny Mac and the Man of Secrets

Rolling on the Floor laughing !!!

Smile :) >> You’re at The Best and Funniest Rofl Blog Ever

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creative non-fiction. pursuit of truth.

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The official Moolta Blog

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The Eagle's Nest

The Everything, Nothing, Something, Anything, My Thing weblog

Parenting And Stuff

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all about Christmas and Santa.

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Life Without Bullshit

The raw truth is like sushi for the soul...it's healthy for ya!